Clean up on aisle 7!

   This last week my host family left so I have the house to myself until the other interns arrive. Since my hostess had been doing all the shopping before this week I went to the grocery store by myself for the first time. As I walked to the grocery store, I felt confident and excited. I had already made my list and even decided I would try itemizing the fruit and veggies. I walked into the shopping center, grabbed a cart and entered the grocery store. Still feeling good.
  First things first, veggies. Power went out. I looked around, surprised, not realizing that the power cut-outs would extend to a shopping center. I think, well how am I supposed to see the cost of this stuff to write it down. Power came back on. I start writing down prices, but the power went out again. This time I act like nothing happened; I didn't look around or act surprised. I tell you, I looked like I belonged. Thankfully the power came back on, and I moved on to the dairy section. Cheese is SO SO expensive here, so I stand with three different choices of Feta trying to figure out if cheaper is better and am I willing to sacrifice taste. I went with the mid-range. As I walk PAST the candy aisle (that's a point of pride for me), and even past the crisp (chip) aisle, I started to wonder if the store has Ritz crackers or Honey Bunches of Oats. Every item on my list I have to search for, read the entire label to make sure it's what I wanted, figure out the exchange rate and if it's worth buying it.

  My shopping continues, I am marking things off my list, and, although I could feel myself growing tired, I felt accomplished. I can totally do this whole living in a different country thing, I thought to myself. As I walked onto the aisle on which the cereal was located, weariness overtook me. I saw the Kelloggs brand name and felt a bit of relief, but then I checked the price: $11 for a box of plain Kelloggs Corn Flakes. What !? No joke, I thought how nice it would be to sit down and cry. Why can't a store sell a box of good cereal for less than $10!? I don't think it's that much to ask. My frustration soon turned to amusement as I thought of turning my little fit into a social experiment. What would the mzungus (white people) and Kenyans do if they found me crying on the floor of the cereal aisle? Maybe I would stand up and give them a hug as I kept crying. 

  I decided against it and checked out. As I walked to the fruit and veg store I started to feel the time crunch of being done by the time my taxi came for me, so I tried to rush through. I started to get frustrated with the prices: 1 kg of garlic for KES 300! I asked one of the workers why it was so expensive; he didn't know. As I went to check out, I felt anxious. What if I go over my budget? I'm sure I bought too much, but how can I tell with all these metric units mocking me. Long story short, I spent less on my fruit and veg than I would if I had bought a five dollar foot long from subway.
  On a more serious note, the following excerpt from Paul Miller's "A Praying Life" really challenged me to think about the whole picture of God's character instead of just one piece of it. For instance, I often get stuck on the thought of His Sovereignty. Having experienced loss and dwelling on God's total control over my life, often leads me to anger towards Him. If He is in control why does He allow the terrible things that happen in our lives?

If God is sovereign, then he is in control of all the details of my life. If He is loving, then He is going to be shaping the details of my life for my good. If He is all-wise, then He's not going to do everything I want because I don't know what I need. If He is patient, then He is going to take time to do all this. When we put it all together--God's sovereignty, love, wisdom, and patience--we have a divine story.

"Come to Me, 

all who are weary and heavy-laden,

and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28